Relationship Analysis : Zelena & Hades Ship from OUAT

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Once Upon a Time is an American fairy tale television series that premiered on October 23, 2011, on ABC. The show takes place in the fictional seaside town of Storybrooke, Maine, whose residents are characters from various fairy tales transported to the “real world” town and robbed of their real memories by a powerful curse. It follows the heroine Emma Swan as she protects the town and its inhabitants from various curses and villains, sometimes involving traveling to other realms. Most episodes involve flashbacks telling its numerous characters’ stories. The show airs Sundays at 8:00 pm ET/7:00 pm CT.

It borrows elements and characters from the Disney-franchise and popular Western literature, folklore, and fairy tales. Once Upon a Time was created by Lost and Tron: Legacy writers Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz.

Back in elementary, the two stories I can’t forget from the classical Greek mythology are Helen of Troy, and Hades and Persephone’s story. I know it’s unfair of Hades to do what he did to Persephone, but it was romantic. To me Persephone was just a mere mortal, but she isn’t. 

Please forgive me then, I was just a child. I honestly don’t know what I was thinking back then. So imagine my surprise when Hades showed up in OUAT.

So I am going to write about the characters Zelena and Hades. This is also unusual because it’s a love affair between supposedly villains who belonged in different stories or realms.

When I first saw Hades in OUAT, I hoped that the writers would somehow follow the Mythology at some point, show the audience Hades’ true nature. But he is obviously a villain since episode 1.

And then I saw the drawing of him and Zelena together, I didn’t like it. Zelena is already a villain in OUAT, and I wanted her badly to patch things up with Regina, and another reason I didn’t like it because Hades is portrayed in several movies,  and even games as a villain. That’s just lazy and mediocre writing. They do it over and over again. 

In the original Greek Mythology,  Hades, God of the Underworld. He is not trying to  overthrow Zeus from the Olymphus. He is a stern God and he strives for balance in life and in death. He gets mad when people escaped the Underworld while other souls pay for their sins

Then again, I can’t believe I’m posting this only now, instead of last year.

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Zelena, the Wicked Witch of the West, is the daughter of Cora Mills. She was born with magical powers. She was abandoned by her mother so she could marry royalty. On that day, she conjured a hurricane that brought her to Oz. She was adopted by a couple. Her adoptive mother loved her, but her adoptive father verbally and physically abused her because of her powers. She grew up Wicked because of what was done to her and plotting her whole life vengeance against her sister, Regina. Whom she believed got everything; parents, the kingdom, and even the teacher. Zelena is introverted, clever, persistent, vindictive, powerful, manipulative, confident, cunning, decisive, independent, and has a very strong personality. Zelena is played by actress, Rebecca Mader.

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Hades, King or Lord of the Underworld. He grew up with his brother Zeus, heir of the Olympus. As time passes, his jealousy over his brother had grown too which led him to kill his Father Kronus, and stole the Olympian Crystal. Zeus stopped Hades heart to keep him in the Underworld as its ruler and snap the Olympian Crystal into two for he knows he won’t be able to repair it without his full power. The only way he can restart his heart is by a true love’s kiss. Hades is extroverted, straight forward, confident, self-assured, arrogant, cunning, vindictive, manipulative, persistent, decisive, and also romantic. He knows who he is, he knows what he wants, and he won’t stop at nothing until he gets it. Hades is played by actor, Greg Germann.
Was It Love At First Sight? 

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Unfortunately, it wasn’t. Hades approached Zelena because she’s got potential to be his ally. He approached her because she was trying to break the laws of magic, and achieve a time travel spell, which is a big deal of magic. He saw potential in making her his partner in crime.

Sure, they both could have found each other to be attractive, but they only did during the 3rd flashback, Almost kiss and bike scene. It was unexpected for both of them, but the sparks were real.

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Hades found Zelena powerful,  brilliantly wicked, witty or clever, and beautiful. Take note that he said that after the 3rd flashback, as if he was like a school boy having his first crush. He realized she could be more, she could break the curse. In his mind, they want the same thing after all.

With Zelena, she could have found him attractive because in a way he is like that too. She could have found him handsome, charming, suave, dashing, confident, cool, collected and romantic. Just like Rebecca Mader said in her interview, no one has ever done like that for Zelena before.

Was there chemistry? 

Somehow I believed there was Intellectual chemistry because Zelena can actually match his wit. They are both good in manipulating people and they enjoy plotting ways to achieve their goals.

At the same time, there was also Camarederie chemistry, they almost have similar childhood backgrounds that made them kindred souls and helped them identify and relate more with each other.

Their past experiences are almost the same, they felt and reacted to the situation the same way, and they want the same thing.

“Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupery

They get what each other suffered, what they felt, and the result was they have the tendency to root for each other. Which is why they have the empowerment chemistry. They made each other feel as if they could do everything in the world. They pretty well know each other’s capability, strengths, and weaknesses. They accept each other for who they are and supports each other. I mean who doesn’t want to be with that kind of person, right?

There was also Sexual chemistry. Every time you watch them interact, you can just see, and feel the chemistry between them. It just sizzles.

Is the devil flirting with me?
Yes, he really was because he does have an agenda.

Another reason for their chemistry is also because of their proximity to each other and tension between them. The air becomes thick, you could feel the heat in your face. Their breathing becomes labored.

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In the rules of personal space, when someone trespasses your personal space, you become flustered, vulnerable and boundaries are broken. Which led to the part when Zelena sat in front of Hades and he felt his heart fluttered for a moment. That was real, but that was love starting to blossom.

The bicycle ride was truly a care free, vulnerable, and fun moment for the two of them.

Thanks to the on and off screen insane chemistry between the actors Rebecca Mader, and Greg Germann. Just like I said, when you’re a director and you have actors with chemistry like that in your hands, it just opens so many possibilities, and potential for a great romance. It’s as if you could get away with anything. And hell they did. 

I don’t want to say this, but yes there was also romantic chemistry. It was just starting to bloom.

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Romance took seed between them for just a little bit because of the emotional intimacy. It is when they shared confidences.

It happened on the 2nd flashback, when Hades reminded Zelena’s past to her and then he shared what his brother did to him.

 

There was also a moment of intimacy on the present day, where Zelena and Hades met by the clock tower. It is when he revealed that he still loves her after all these years, that he was trying to get her baby for her, and when he told her, he made her own Storybrooke. That it was their decay. He basically changed his kingdom for her. He revealed it with the risk of getting rejected again.

I believe he doesn’t need the baby because he’s got the Olympian Crystal to defeat his brother.

In the Principle of Completion, it was a symbiotic relationship for both of them. You see, Hades fell for Zelena because of the way she made him feel. Even though he’s got nefarious plans when it came to her, and the heroes, he couldn’t control what he felt for her. She believed that he’s capable of love, she wanted his plans to come true, she wanted him to succeed, and she wanted to share her life with him despite having trust issues. And somehow, she brought back the notion of love, fun, hope, and innocence to him.

As for Zelena, it was the same thing. He valued her strengths, he accepted her for she is, he wanted to help make her plans come true, and last but not the least he appreciated her inside and out.

They complement each other so well, they could satisfy each other so well, and they could benefit from each other. The combination of them together is too powerful to ignore.

When it comes to their Lovemap, Zelena and Hades are practically have matching lovemaps. Due to their similar nature and personalities, experiences, motivations, and upbringing. That was when they first met.

Zelena’s  lovemap changed along the way, when her baby was born, and when she gained her mother and Regina. So when she met Hades again, she’s completely a different person.

As for Hades lovemap, for a God, he never felt it before, but when Zelena came to his life. Yes, it was in his best in interest, but he tailored his wants and his life to her. He considered staying in Oz and that he doesn’t care about his plans anymore and all he wants is her. He may have been faking it, but that was his view of love before.

Zelena told him, “If you did (love me), you wouldn’t take my best chance for revenge.

When you love someone, you will teach them what’s right, and prevent them from doing something wrong.

Several years later and they met again.

Hades adapted his lovemap again to Zelena. Zelena wanted revenge before, so this time he changed his tune, “What better revenge than having it all?

Why are they drawn to each other? 

The reason why they are drawn to each other is also the reason why it could never work between them. Unless, they truly work things. I don’t say this lightly, just because I’m being optimistic or because I’m a shipper of theirs. Couples like that in real life can truly work it out. People are drawn to people who is familiar with them.

Zelena and Hades are drawn to each other because they have a similar past. When a person finds someone familiar, it’s easy to get them, to understand them, and to fall in love with them.

As for Zelena and Hades’ case, they want to have it all. Hades knows that Zelena never felt love. So he knew exactly what to do to reel her in.When Zelena finally gave him a chance to be with her. In a way, Zelena had also have him wrapped around her finger a bit.

Hades knew that Zelena is already torn apart. But even that was the case, he was still confident and believed that Zelena loves him. Because if at some point, he believes it wasn’t real. Then Zelena would have never restarted his heart and he would have taken Gold’s deal to make sure he survives. But he trusted Zelena with his everything. He was compliant because she gave him a chance, she defended him, she fought for him.
Teaching someone or yourself to love someone that’s easy, but to make someone fall in love with you. As in make him or her your true love, that’s hard. Unless she was in the position to fall in love, which she was.

Other fans had theorized that Zelena is somehow, OUAT version of Persephone. I don’t know what the writers are thinking, but it could have been. Zelena maybe the Wicked Witch of the West, but she’s got innocence in her.

When it comes to Hades, Zelena is so naive. When it comes to love, she’s very clueless because she never felt it before. I hope in a way she is because I don’t want to see another woman pair up with Hades, but only Zelena.

Another comparison with Persephone is Hades also betrayed Zelena by setting up Hook and Emma from getting the ambrosia, and trapping the heroes: David, Robin, Henry, and Regina at the library.

The famous version of Hades & Persephone’s story is that after Hades kidnapped Persephone at the Underworld, Demeter asked Zeus for help. But the unfamous original story of Hades and Persephone is that after Hades fell for her, Hades told Zeus that secret. Zeus actually helped Hades plan to trap Persephone and pull her to the Underworld. 

Persephone ate the pomegrate seeds without knowing what it means. She was sad at first, but she grew to love Hades and eventually became happy again. 

I’m actually torned because in the Musical, I shipped the Wicked Witch of the West with Fiyero, but in OUAT, I totally shipped Zelena and Hades.
Zelena grew up into a strong, wicked, beautiful, formidable woman, but she’s also a child who never felt love her entire life, she’s got trust and abandonment issues just like any other kids in her situation. She may be the eldest daughter, but whenever I watch the show, Regina acted more mature and wise. Because she’s got her parents, Daniel, then Robin’s love, Henry, and her friends love and support.

Love bloomed between them right away but Zelena protected herself the first time Hades confessed his love to her.

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I do believe his heart fluttered.

He may have felt true love for Zelena, but it wasn’t enough. And besides, he doesn’t even know how to love.

Zelena was used to people hating her, and not choosing her. It’s hard for her to believe that someone could ever love her.

In fact it speaks true to Elphaba’s song in the Musical version of Wicked, “As Long As Your Mine”.

“Kiss me so fiercely, hold me too tight.

I need help believing your with me tonight.

My aimless dreaming could not foresee, lying beside you, with you wanting me.”

Another influence on Zelena is Belle. Zelena hesitated running to Hades with open arms because she might end up just like Belle. But Belle is also right, she’s afraid. She’s not afraid of Hades, she’s afraid to be rejected again, to get her hopes up, and to be left again.

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In addition to this, another event that influenced Zelena is when Cora returned Regina and Zelena memories to patched their relationship.

Regina and Zelena now have a little better sisterly relationship. Ever since Hades showed up in Zelena’s life again, she’s been in a roller coaster of emotions because it concerned so many people.

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When Regina supported Zelena in going to Hades, to find another love. It was sweet. In that moment, she truly gained her sister back, and somehow Regina is slowly beginning to trust her.

Did Love grew between them?

With Zelena:

(1) In the 3rd flashback, the almost kiss and bike ride scene, Zelena found herself enjoying a different company compared to what she’s used to. She enjoyed Hades company and undivided attention to her. He believed in her, and he encouraged her. Even Zelena admitted that she felt something for him even though it was too early to say it was love. At least she still have her con hat on.

(2) Meeting Hades again by the clock tower. She was in the position to fall deeper for him because she was vulnerable and confused. She was vulnerable because she thought that Hades is after her baby for his time travel spell. This is a big reveal of Hades devotion and commitment to win her because she also found he made her dreams come true, almost because he created Zelena, her own Storybrooke, he tortured Cora to get Zelena’s birthday, and last, but not the least is he told her he would still wait for her when she’s ready.

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(3) When Hades took care of Zelena’s enemy, Dorothy, even when she didn’t even ask him too. He made an effort without her asking for it. And with Belle’s encouragement to try to find out if it’s going to work somehow gave Zelena a different perspective.

With Hades:

(1) Same thing with Zelena, the 3rd flashback, almost kiss and bike scene. Yes, Hades was only trying to gain Zelena as a partner, but something unexpected happened. When Zelena sat in front of him, his heart fluttered. And when they got to Dorothy’s location, take note that he started praising her differently compared to the 1st and 2nd flashback.

(2) Now bringing us to the 4th flashback, when he left Zelena at Dorothy’s location to prepare a surprise dinner with her. The first time he confessed his feelings for her. Zelena may have admitted that she felt something, but she’s not ready to trust, and to love. He may have said, Zelena will regret it, but it’s only anger talking. Just like any human being, when they are rejected, they become more motivated.

Dr. Helen Fisher’s research said from her book, Why We Love. As adversity intensifies, so does romantic passion. Adversity heightens passion, romance, and romantic zeal. Adversity stimulates romantic ardour. Adversity heightens pursuit, just as barriers intensify romantic passion. This applies to 3 and 4 below.

(3) Which is why he created the Storybrooke for her and tried to rescue her baby for her.

They may be separated from different realms, but Hades became obsessed with the idea of her and Zelena. His idea of them together, kept him going all those years.

(4) This one applies to Zelena and Hades. What they felt for each other, deepened because they were both in the position to fall in love.

With Hades, Zelena’s life was threatened by Rumple and Peter Pan. Go back to what I mentioned above, this adversity intensified Hades want for Zelena to survive, which also forced his hand to make a deal with Emma.

With Zelena, she became the damsel in distress. In Zelena’s view, Hades didn’t just save her life, he also ripped a contract which goes against his nature, and he tried to work with Emma. That’s a big deal because Emma is the savior even though it’s also a deal.

According to Dr. Helen Fisher, people have the tendency to fall in love when they are vulnerable. This is the hero complex where a person tends to fall for the person who saved them.

(5) Last but not the least, it was even confirmed here that what they had is true love and they genuinely love each other. 

That’s how it became a True Love’s kiss for the both of them.

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Why it didn’t work out between them?

I said before that the reason they were drawn and fell in love with each other is due to their similar backgrounds, worldview, personality, and goals in their life. They are practically mirror image.

When Hades and Zelena met again. So much has changed for Zelena, she’s got a baby, she gained her sister and somehow the heroes on her side, and the most important of all is her closure with her mother. Zelena no longer wants, what Hades wants. There’s already a fall out between them.

At the same time, I believe that Hades truly love Zelena, but his priorities are different from hers. He was still consumed by his vengeance against his brother, Zeus, and the idea to beat the heroes.

Another very sweet moment here is when Regina supported Zelena. I know Regina was trying to be a good sister to her when she said that. But they both just lost their mother, and just recently gained each other as sisters. They were too emotional and vulnerable to make any decision at all. It’s sweet and such a sister thing to do, but Regina shouldn’t have done it.

I actually find the scene very funny when Regina broke the news to Emma, David, and Hook that she supported Zelena to go to Hades. Her face showed that somehow she realized shouldn’t have done it, but she did it because she’s trying to trust Zelena’s judgement and because they are family.

Somehow I knew that the writers won’t make a relationship between Zelena and Hades work because it’s not the right time for them. They are both clueless when it comes to love. They don’t know how to love. Hades may have followed Nicholas Sparks ways from the Notebook in sweeping Zelena off her feet, but it wasn’t enough.

In reality, Love conquers all, if you know and understand how to love, Love is a big deal. Zelena was actually in the right mind when she rejected him the second time around. But Belle truly turned things around for her. Kudos to Belle.

As for me, I truly hope that Hades and Zelena can be together. The writers could have given Hades and not just Zelena to redeem theirselves. I wish the writers went with the original story of Hades eventually. It won’t happen overnight, but I’m willing to wait. They can still be together. After all, people who die in OUAT always have a way of coming back. I love Fiyero, but I’m sticking with Hades here. I wish the writers had done more by making their personality complement each other, and not just by their similarities. And I hate that the writers made Hades not good enough for Zelena. 

I have a theory that since the final battle is coming, maybe the writers don’t know for sure if they’re going to get renewed. They did said from their interview that they were wrapping all the stories of the characters. So they’re actually doing the fans a favor. It’s just a theory though.

So they’ve finished Hades story right away by killing him. Besides he’s not even a main character, he’s just a guest. If they could make the Evil Queen, Hook, and more good, they could make Hades good too. Just like they wrapped Liam’s story, Gaston’s, Regina’s father, Cora’s, Zelena which she somehow achieved since little Robyn was born, and up to the part when Hades accidentally brought them to the Underworld, and more.

Of all the relationship analysis I’ve written, the characters (Zelena and Hades) and the actors (Rebecca Mader and Greg Germann), are so far the one with the most insane chemistry. I can’t believe they topped my Tauriel and Kili from The Hobbit.

I didn’t want to be believe that Hades is dead for good. Most importantly,  I don’t want to believe that Hades never loved and appreciated Zelena. But it makes me wonder, because according to the qoute from the classical Greek mythology,

“Gods live their own lives apart from men, free of sickness, pain, and of course death.

Only through a God’s attachment to some mortal does he know true suffering.

So what about Hades? Was he ever attached to Zelena. Cause if he was, he was truly capable of giving up all his plans for her. But he didn’t.

And what about Zelena, was she somehow attached Hades too? I honestly have no idea how to answer this. Then again he’s her first love and first love never dies after all. What she needs to do is learn to love herself, and be the best she could for her baby. 

Relationship Analysis: Brown Sugar

Brown Sugar  is a 2002 American romantic comedy film written by Michael Elliott and Rick Famuyiwa, directed by Famuyiwa, and starring Taye Diggs and Sanaa Lathan. The film is a story of a lifelong friends, A&R Andre and Editor-in-Chief Sidney.
88d74b48b3af5c4771a8e445d00dfc97 The movie started with the question, When did you fall in love with Hip-Hop? At first, I didn’t know the significance of that question, until I got to the end of the movie.

It’s not the just the story of how Hip-Hop started and evolved, but it’s also a story about how love grew between two people.

 

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Young Dre and Sid

The two can attribute their friendship and the launch of their careers to a single, seminal childhood moment – the day they discovered hip-hop on a New York street corner. Now some 15 years later, as they lay down the tracks toward their futures, hip-hop isn’t the only thing that keeps them coming back to that moment on the corner.

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Sidney Shaw fell in love with Hip-Hop and later became a music journalist and a successful editor for the XXL  magazine. She is smart, caring, strong, stubborn, hardworking, sensible, mature, clever, and passionate at what she does. In the movie, Sid served as the voice of reason, although she had her moments of being lost and confused, and when she slept with Dre. At least she made the right decision to ask for some space to think, and figure things out.She is played  by actress, Sanaa Lathan.

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Dre Ellis fell in love with Hip-Hop and later became a successful music executive. He is caring, fun, smart, stubborn, hardworking, charming, childish, and a player. In the movie, Dre is a bit messed up for me. He slept with Sid after finding out his wife cheated on him. It was hot, but I don’t consider it as the ultimate consummation of their love for each other. It was just wrong for me. He is played by actor and singer Taye Diggs.

For years, I binge on watching movies about best friends ending up together, but as I grew up, I realized that it’s bullsh*t to push the idea to people. Some writers, producers, and directors don’t understand the process of true love and relationships because if they do, they wouldn’t have done the particular movie theme. It doesn’t mean I’m not a fan of the idea, but I do believe that some best friends are meant to be together. And Brown Sugar is one of the movies, that is realistic and true.

86932283-a128-469a-9a00-f4f23ed2d061They are not affected by the Westermarck Effect. 

Why? 

Because they had come to like each other first/ fell in love with each other first before they even became friends. 

In the Westermarck Effect, men and women who grew up together in a close proximity have reached a certain level of intimacy and familiarity that prevents them from falling in love. 

What’s great about Dre and Sid is that they fell in love with each other, the day they also fell in love with hip hop. I always consider the first meeting to be important. I’m glad that they included it in the movie and they showed how important it was.

Dre getting engaged with Reese was the trigger of Sid’s secret feelings to come out, and it somehow also triggered Dre’s when they kissed the night before he got married. At first they tried to live their lives like before, but it didn’t work out because of the closeness they have and when Dre quit his job and told Sid first before his wife, Reese.

This is where I relate the quote of Antoine de Saint-Exupery below.

love-quotes-and-sayings2In the movie, Dre and Sid grew up keeping the same direction which is hip hop. They may have different careers, but their careers still involves hip-hop. It’s the factor that held them close to each other including the other factors that they grew up together, and they’re great friends.

Their chemistry in the movie started with Activity chemistry, when they discovered and fell in love with hip-hop when they were ten years old. As a person, we love to spend time with people who has the same interests with us, and the one who shares a hobby, and/or a passion with us.

Due to the 15 years of friendship between them, it made them very familiar of each other. In the movie, I saw the frequent times, Dre went to Sid, despite being married. When it comes to relationship, when the attachment had formed, we want to stick with them. And here, we can see that Dre is glued to Sid despite being married.

As for their Personality and Compatibility, Sid and Dre has compatible personalities, lifestyle, and careers. They are a team. He writes, creates, and/or produces music, and she writes a review about it. Dre is the thinker and the doer. Sid is also a thinker, a doer, and a supporter. She’s the voice of reason and support to Dre. And Dre also supports and believes in her.

As for the Principle of Completion, Sid gave Dre his key feeling. She supported him in everything as shown on the scene when he told her that he’s going to make his own record label and she became a financial source to him. She told him, “Look, you’re my best friend. There’s nobody who believes in you more than me.” She helped him make his dreams come true, contrary to what his wife did. His wife, Reese, doesn’t know better and she just treated his dream as a hobby.

At the same time, Dre also gave Sid her key feeling to feel complete. He appreciates her as a person, as a friend, and especially her skills as a writer, as an editor, and as a music journalist. He still remembers her first article, and he reads her column on the L.A. Times religiously, because it makes him feel closer to her. Compared to Kelby, her fiance, who only read the article she wrote about him. Sure, I’ll give him some break and consider that he did promised to read all her work, he takes care of her, he cooks for her, and he’s trying to accept Sid’s friendship with Dre. 

The problem is Sid is not just committed to him, the way she’s committed to Dre and his dreams and to her work. Her relationship with Kelby is a relationship that’s bound to end from the start.

Another good thing going on between them is their Intimacy. Sid and Dre already have emotional intimacy because of their 15 years of friendship. And that intimacy equates to the level of familiarity the characters have. That familiarity provided the characters a comfort blanket that made them stick to each other. 

As for Dre and Sid’s Lovemap, I will compare it to the research John Money, Emeritus Psychologist and Sexologist, had done years ago with kids. He conducted a research with kids ages from 8 to 11 years old. It is where he showed them pictures of other kids and made them choose. Then several years later, he got back to them and discovered that majority of them were married to the person who’s got a similarity to the person they chose from the pictures.

That research also applied to Sid and Dre. The only difference is they grew up together. They molded each other’s lovemap as they grew up. They both love hip-hop which served as a glue to their friendship and which led them to fall in love with each other. As time goes by, that friendship and love became deeper and more mature. And when that happened, that’s where romantic chemistry and sexual chemistry set in.

In the movie, Sid finished her book and called it “I Used To Love Him“, she described it as her love letter to hip-hop.

Her final words in her book.

I always thought, one day I would outgrow my relationship with hip-hop. 

I never thought it was a fad, like many.

But I never thought it could grow and mature.

I thought it would be an adolescent memory I’d look back on, like a crush on the captain of the football team.
But I realize we have more than that. Much more. 

We have a history…a friendship.
We listen to each other.
We laugh together.
We finish each other’s lyrics.
I don’t have to pretend with hip-hop, and hip-hop doesn’t have to pretend with me.

My feelings have never been more clear, and I know they will never go away.
To Hip-hop.

Just like any best friends who crossed the line of friendship to love, their is a bump and that’s the fear that the relationship might not work, and they might lose the friendship. Which is what happened to Sid. So in the last scene, after some time had passed,  it was finally revealed to everyone that Hip-hop is Dre to Sid. She said.

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During Sid’s interview in Hot 97, Dre called and asked her the question back, “When did you fall in love with Hip-Hop?” She finally told him the truth and he told her.

“Sidney… I have loved you from the first time I laid eyes on you.
And I love you still. You’re my air.
So, I don’t want to be your friend no more.”

This is the first time where Sid and Dre told each other that they’ve been in love with each other for a long time after everything that happened between them. It’s doesn’t exactly follow the process or stages of love I wrote about, but it is realistic. After all, love doesn’t care if it’s proper or right, it just wants to exist. And that’s why we all have brains to make the right decision and not just follow our heart all time. Because our emotions, when it comes to love, relationships, and decision making, it can also be governed by being lost, confusion, stress, lust, and more.

What I can say with the script is it was clever. I love the research they made. How they wrote the love story, and include hip-hop in it. It’s probably a very simple story, but it’s the kind of movie every in loved best friends should watch. It’s the kind of movie, you’d want to watch and get that good feeling in the end, also the really good and thrilling feeling of falling in love. The theme of the movie is subtle, the script wasn’t preachy, the scenes, and the chemistry of the actors are not forced. It is a movie, that will make you laugh, cry, fall in love, and feel the thrill for almost two hours.

Relationship Analysis: Avatar

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Avatar (marketed as James Cameron’s Avatar) is a 2009 American epic science fiction film directed, written, produced, and co-edited by James Cameron, and starring Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldana, Stephen Lang, Michelle Rodriguez, and Sigourney Weaver. The film is set in the 22nd century, when humans are colonizing Pandora, a lush habitable moon of a gas giant in the Alpha Centauri star system, in order to mine the mineral unobtanium, a room-temperature superconductor. The expansion of the mining colony threatens the continued existence of a local tribe of Na’vi – a humanoid species indigenous to Pandora. The film’s title refers to a genetically engineered Na’vi body with the mind of a remotely located human that is used to interact with the natives of Pandora.

HumansullyJake Sully was a former marine and who replaced his twin brother, Tom Sully, in the Avatar Program. He  is an introvert, fearless, determined, has a good heart, headstrong, has a lot of guts, cheeky, charming, a fast learner, adaptable, and cold to outsiders, but once he gets to know you and vice versa, he opens up to them.

His training and experience as a marine made it easier for him to relate with the Na’vi, and he’s injury made him look at things in a different perspective. He is portrayed by Sam Worthington.

When it comes to Jake’s *lovemap, I interpret the person’s lovemap usually by basing it on their upbringing, their relationships with everyone around them, and their experiences that will mold their lovemap match.Avatar actor iphone 6 plus wallpaper

Since I can’t find all the information I need about Jake and Neytiri, I can only based their lovemap’s interpretation through their chemistry, their personality, and their experiences.

For Jake’s, I believe that when it comes to a woman, he would want someone tough and someone who could handle his personality, and accept him wholly even the baggage he brings.

And somehow Neytiri matches Jake’s lovemap because she’s tough and she can handle him just fine.

He fell for her because even though he’s a moron, slowly she accepted him for who he is. She gave him so much.

In fact, the song I See You by Leona Lewis, described it pretty well. She opened his eyes to their culture, spirituality, and most important of all, love. She basically gave him a new life, a new start in the clan. She revolutionized his world and gave him a new perspective in life. She made him care and feel not just for him, but for the people around him too.

In the movie, there was the  Jake’s dream hunt scene that wasn’t used in the movie. In here, Grace won’t allow Jake to eat the worm because it might kill him. They don’t know what the worm would do to an avatar’s brain. Grace also told him that he can never truly be with her, because he will always go back to his own body. But Jake was desperate to become one of them. I love this scene, because this is where I saw how much Jake wanted to become one of them, how much he wanted to be with Neytiri. So it’s a very important scene for this post.

In the dream, he was supposed to hunt the animal that would represent him and it will also let him truly See like the People. Well, that’s what the scene meant to me.

Was it love at first sight for Jake?

It could have been. Why? Because Neytiri saved his life. And just like I explained before in my Relationship Analysis for Tauriel and Kili here, Jake unbelievably is the damsel in distress. Whether we like it or not, we tend to fall for the person who saves us in every way. It is also easy to fall in love especially when we are vulnerable. And he is vulnerable because he almost got killed the first time they met.

Another reason is he was impressed by Neytiri. As a marine, he probably assumed that he can take all those viperwolves with his training and experiences in the war. And he didn’t expect to be saved by a local Na’vi girl with impressive skills. He’s a marine and he can’t even take them, but she did.

neytiri_in_avatar_2-wide-do-we-really-need-avatar-2Neytiri te Tskaha Mo’at’ite is the Na’vi princess of the Omaticaya clan. Neytiri is the daughter of the Chief and Tsahik (One who interprets the will of Eywa, their clan’s diety). She is considered of royal blood as her parents owned the highest title of the tribe. She is loyal, brave, has a strong will, wise beyond her years due to her ranked, tough, caring,  stubborn and rebellious. The Omaticaya clan hated the sky people, because according to them, it’s hard for sky people to See and also because Neytiri’s older sister, Sylwanin died in front of her. She is portrayed by Zoe Saldana.

Jake met Neytiri when she saved him from the viperwolves in the forest. She was supposed to kill him, but there was a sign from a woodsprite, very pure spirit (Seeds from the Secret Tree). She planned to leave him afterwards, but more woodsprites surrounded him.
Neytiri’s parents, the Chief and Tsahik of the tribe, decided to let him stay to study him because he is a warrior dreamwalker. And they’ve never met a warrior before that belonged from the Sky People (depicting people from planet Earth). Neytiri impressed Jake. But Neytiri thinks he’s a moron for not knowing what to do.

She saved him because he’s got a strong heart. No fear, but stupid and ignorant.

Tsu’tey is supposed to mate with Neytiri and the next Chief of the tribe. I can’t say much about them, but it only seemed like a political match. They greet each other formally, but they don’t seem close. They don’t seem to see into each other, only their relationship with the nature and Eywa. Tsu’tey and Neytiri are only united by their goals to rule and protect the clan. He may have real feelings for Neytiri, but she fell in love with Jake.

But then, there were deleted scenes I got from Avatar Wiki and Extended DVD Edition (I think?). One of them is where Tsu’tey got jealous of Jake. In the party where Jake finally became a part of the people. Tsu’tey was supposed to open up to him, but Neytiri invited Jake to dance. Tsu’tey was jealous and especially when he realized that Neytiri mated with Jake.

It was also during their dance where Mo’at and Eytucan decided to separate Jake and Neytiri. They noticed their closeness and that they’ve fallen for each other. This is an important scene for this post because it showed the real status or how Jake and Neytiri perceived each other.

Of course, Neytiri was sneaky, that’s when she took Jake to the tree of souls. Then she explained that since he’s already part of their clan, he may carve his bow from the wood of hometree and he may choose a woman. And we know what happened next.

This is the first time I’m going to bring up the *Westermarck Effect. It is said that when a man and woman who lived in close domestic proximity during the first few years (0-6 yrs old) of their lives, they become desensitized to sexual attraction. It is according to Finnish Anthropologist Edvard Westermarck in his book The History of Human Marriage (1891).

Also, even Dr. Helen Fisher, an Anthropologist and Relationship Scientist, in her book Why We Love, said that when a man and woman reach a certain level of friendship, intimacy, and familiarity, they become desensitized to sexual attraction and romantic feelings to each other.

When it comes to body chemicals: The chemistry of attachment, can quell the chemistry of romance. The kind of attachment Neytiri have with Tsu’tey is too much and family like, to the point it has already desensitized her  from falling in love for him.

I’m sure Neytiri cared for Tsu’tey, but not in a romantic way.

For Neytiri’s *lovemap, I have to admit that somehow it was hard for me to observe, because I usually observe real people, I only got to observe Neytiri closely through her facial expressions, voice, and body language. They made it easier for me to detect what she’s feeling.

While Neytiri gave Jake so much, I can say that she fell for a Skxawng (Moron) who made the effort and never gave up to study their culture, and relationship with their diety, Eywa. Just like Jake said, At first it was just orders. Then everything changed. I fell in love with the forest, with the Omaticaya People, with you. 

He gave his everything to her, because what did he have to lose? Most important of all, he let her be herself and appreciated and accepted her for who she is, because in the tribe, she needs to act as the chief and tsahik’s daughter, and tsu’tey’s betrothed. But with Jake, it’s different. He can make her smile and laugh. He somehow opened her mind more to sky people, that there’s goodness in some sky people and they are able to See.

According to the Avatar Wiki, Neytiri is supposed to be in her teens or she’s eighteen years old, but despite the young age, Na’vi grow up fast. With the efforts Jake had done to become a part of The People. He also became someone to lean on and depend on by Neytiri. When Jake became the 6th Turok Macto, Neytiri was afraid, but not anymore when he came back and sided with them.

Was it love at first sight for Neytiri?

I believe so, in the form of being drawn to him. It wasn’t obvious because of the existing hatred for Sky People. She wants nothing to do with him, but whether she likes it or not she was drawn to him. She grew fonder of him and slowly, she realized that he made her feel things that she never felt before and feelings that even Tsu’tey could never trigger in her. He is a moron, but he gets away with it with his fearlessness, boldness, charm, cheekiness, confidence, and eventually hardwork to become one of them. His fearless nature is truly a sight to behold, it could take your breath away. He is the kind of guy who would jump over a cliff even if he doesn’t even know what he’s doing.

It would have been really easy for Jake and Neytiri to fall for each other because they spend too much time together. While watching the movie, the Na’vis don’t seem to have the concept of personal space because they touch intimate body areas all the time like their chests, arms, and they invade someone’s personal space all the time. I mean even Tsu’tey touched Jake in his chest. Casually touching each other is essential cause in their tribe that’s what Seeing into someone truly means. avatar_2_posterThe people are close to each other because they have physical, emotional, and spiritual intimacy.

Just like how Norm is trying to explain to Jake. When they say I See into you, it doesn’t mean I see you in front of me. Instead it’s saying I See INTO you. Which I will relate to what I said in my Intimacy post.

Intimacy is INTO-ME-SEE. When you say I See you, I see into you physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

In real life, you can also be close to someone physically, emotionally, and spiritually. But it takes a lot of work. It involves consistent transparency to each other, communication and quality time together.

The other way is through meditation in a sacred or quiet place. Jaime T. Licauco, an authority in the Psi Phenomena and a Parapsychologist,  is a living proof to this event. He explained his experience in detail in one of his books. In his experience, he and a woman merge souls and they were able to see into each other’s past experiences, feelings, thoughts, and more.

What is somehow good in Neytiri and Jake’s relationship is that before they became physically intimate, somehow they were able to get to know each other, and study to become intimate emotionally and spiritually. Which is essential in every relationship that ever existed. They became friends first, became familiar, and eventually fell in love.

Just like in any other relationship, it’s the differences that draws you to each other more. And the more they spend time together, the more they adapt to each other’s personality, culture, beliefs, they even start to resemble each other and even copy each other’s mannerisms.

Basing it from the *Principle of Completion, Jake and Neytiri made each other feel the key feeling they’ve been looking for. Even if Neytiri, wants nothing to do with him first, she eventually became a big supporter to him. And as for her, Jake appreciated Neytiri as a person and he let her be herself. And the most important thing he gave her is he somehow he returned some innocence in her because of Jake’s childish wonder. She lost that innocence when her sister died, and when she became the next Tsahik of the Omaticaya Clan.

Jake and Neytiri are united not just by their similar goals to care and protect the clan, they are also brought together by their love, and by their spiritual relationship with the nature and their diety, Eywa. Eywa choose Jake for the Omaticaya, and also for Neytiri. Jake and Neytiri’s union was blessed by Eywa. 

Do they have *chemistry?

I think they have the *activity or *creative chemistry. After Jake bonded with his ikran, their relationship reached a different level because Jake is good at flying. And when two people enjoy the same things, their chemistry grows.

Eventually as they got closer, *romantic chemistry happened. You can see it in the way they interact, their looks, touches, and body language.

Due to their personalities compatibility and being able to bond with their queues, I can’t imagine their relationship ever diminishing in the years to come. Instead I expect it to grow more and I expect them as a couple who are one in mind, body, and soul. Of course, they have their own individuality. But they also have a natural affinity to each other which is already obvious before they even mated, and made the bond (tsaheylu, connecting their queues). Or am I expecting too much? They have a neural connection after all. I believed that they feel each other physically, emotionally, and spiritually aware of each other’s thoughts, feelings, and their past experiences.

zoesaldanasamworthington62ndannualdirectorsxo33migqysvlThe effective and captivating relationship between Jake and Neytiri is also thanks to the actors Sam Worthington and Zoe Saldana. God! They really have a damn good chemistry. You can see it in the way they interact in their interviews. It’s fun and refreshing to watch them. You won’t get enough of them. I’ll even pay big money just to watch them host any show. Kidding. 😉 Don’t have that kind of money, but still. They’re really fun and entertaining to watch. When you have that kind of chemistry between two actors in your hands, there’s so much potential in a romantic story, and it would be easy to get away with any scene or story.

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Due to my busy schedule since 2004, I hardly have time to explore on movies I like so I wasn’t aware of the planned sequels of Avatar. Last July, I saw Avatar a couple of times on Star Movies and it made me want to write a Relationship Analysis just because of the words, I See You. I wasn’t a big fan of Avatar the first time, but I’m already a big fan of James Cameron.

So after seeing Avatar in a different light and a couple of times. It just grows in you. Of course, I’ll have to say that what James Cameron achieved with Titanic, Avatar and other movies is a stroke of genius that never ceases to amaze me and always captures my attention.

I was hopeful for a sequel. And then last Sunday, as I was researching for this post, I only found out about the planned sequel, and the explanation why there are planned 4 sequels. I was ecstatic. I found out the sequels here. Click link for more details. I debated whether to continue this post or not, because I don’t write relationship analysis post for stories that are not done yet, just like what I did with Before Trilogy directed by John Carney.

Now, I will repeat what I said in my twitter. I’m hopeful, skeptical, and a little excited.

Hopeful that it will succeed. Even though I have a special love for The Hobbit, I wished that it won’t have the same flaws of The Hobbit trilogies. I wish that the story would be somehow original, unpredictable, and that they keep my attention to Jake and Neytiri’s relationship, and that they make their relationship consistent and improved.

Considering that when it comes to love stories, James Cameron approach here and in Titanic is always life changing by someone who is lost or in a lifetime crisis. In Titanic, it was Rose who was somehow in a crisis. And Rose said that Jack saved him in all the way a person can be saved. I’m paraphrasing. In Avatar, it was Jake who was saved by Neytiri, but in the end, they both saved each other, and their whole clan which meant more.

 

Relationship Analysis: Best Of Me

~ S  P  O  I  L  E  R    A  L  E  R  T ~

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The Best of Me is an American romantic drama film directed byMichael Hoffman and written by Will Fetters and J. Mills Goodloe, based on Nicholas Sparks’ 2011 novel of the same name. The film stars James Marsden and Michelle Monaghan with Luke Bracey and Liana Liberato.

First, I just need to get this out of my system. What is it with tragic love stories and stars?

I promised you last week that I’m going to write about a movie with a happy ending. Because I’ll admit that I still can’t move on from Tauriel and Kili’s love story. I’m at least glad that there’s closure for both characters in the Best Of Me.

I always love Nicholas Sparks works ever since I read The Wedding. That’s the story that made me buy and read his work, but he broke my heart when he wrote Dear John and I was/ am also brokenhearted so I stayed away from love stories for a while.

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When I saw the Best Of Me novels, I was excited to read it and watch it. Another reason I love Best of Me is because I’ve always loved Liana Liberato and Michelle Monaghan.

The reason I chose it because I’ve always thought it was a happy ending and I’m having a really hard time writing an analysis for the movie I chose for this week.

My analysis for the story is somehow split because I love the chemistry of the adult actors, but I wasn’t feeling it between the younger actors, but it was nice seeing the flashbacks. It gave me insights on their relationship.

In the movie, Amanda is the one with an outgoing, straightforward, kind, and bubbly personality. She’s also determined and passionate for children since she plans to major in child psychology and public policy.

While Dawson is shy, doesn’t know how to talk or flirt with a girl, respectful, hardworking, studious, introverted, passive, abusive upbringing,  and he likes the stars. He shared his interest in the stars when he said that humans have always looked up to the stars for consulting and that he made his own telescope.

With those descriptions between two characters, you can sense right away that they have chemistry. They are a complete opposite of each other and that’s what’s pulling their characters together.

My favorite scene here is when they were talking as adults and Amanda said that it’s dangerous for them then she complained how he didn’t get ugly or something. It was great. I can’t ignore the sizzling tension between the characters.

Friendship, intimacy, and security somehow go hand in hand between Amanda and Dawson because they were able to share parts of their lives right away with each other. On the part where she confronted him for making her wait, showing her his bruises, and getting to know each other in the water tank.

As for love, as time goes by, the friendship grew into something more.

When Dawson got shot, I was shocked, but what made me cry is when he fell, and the last thing he saw were the stars.

It reminded me of their last goodbye ever since their reunion.

One of the things he said:

“I’m gonna trust in the stars,” He said that because he considered their reunion as a second chance for them to fix the things they’ve left behind. It provided closure for both them and declaration of love after all these years. It’s my second favorite scene.

In fact, he was hoping that the universe will realign the stars for them and things will fall into place for them. And when he closed his eyes, he saw Amanda in the garden in Tuck’s house.

In the movie, I don’t remember where Dawson’s mom is, but that’s how lovemap came into play in his life. Somehow Amanda also took cared of him the way a mom should. As for Amanda, she has a privileged upbringing, but when Dawson came into her life, just by existing, he made the best version of herself.

This is an incredible movie because at the same time, they also tried to establish how the characters Amanda and Dawson were fated to each other.

  • First is when they were younger. Amanda asked Tuck if he believes in fate or destiny. Instead, he shared a part of his love story with his wife which says that he believed in coincidences and faith. At that time, Dawson refused to believe any of it.
  • When Dawson had an accident where the explosion threw him in the water, he dreamed of Amanda then after waking up, he got a call about Tuck. That’s what made him believe that somehow it led him to find her again.
  • Due to the hardships and loneliness, Amanda experienced, she became scared and believed that fate and destiny are not real.
  • And when he died, yes, he saw the stars. He closed his eyes, and he saw his dream again in the hospital. And that scene where everything made sense.

I truly believe that there’s an endless love, but unfortunately, it’s not just for the characters somehow. Even if Dawson died, a part of Dawson will somehow always be with Amanda.

It’s still a great movie, with a very interesting twist and I still recommend it.

*Thus marked words are defined on this LINK.

Relationship Analysis: Tauriel and Kili from The Hobbits

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The Hobbits: Desolation of Smaug, I saw the movie parts a couple of times, but during those times, I’ve never seen any scene of Tauriel and Kili until two weeks ago. I was able to watch the whole movie. Then luckily, since The Hobbits is the movie of the month in Star Movies this October, they aired everything including the last installment, The Hobbits: Battle of the Five Armies. So I finally got to see what happens to Tauriel and Kili. Well, I know what’s already going to happen because I’ve read the books.

Their romantic subplot captured my attention, but I told myself that I’m not going to write a relationship analysis between them because they have too few screentime together. I don’t know enough about their characters, let alone their lovemap. Yet here I am due to the numerous video interviews and reviews I’ve read about the movie. I somehow got the information I needed to make this post possible.

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Tauriel and Kili’s relationship in the movie is a non-conventional love story or romantic subplot between an elf and a dwarf.

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Tauriel is a low Silvan elf and a Captain of the Guards in Mirkwood. Her parents were murdered when she was young and Thranduil took care of her and raised her beside Legolas. Tauriel is played by Evangeline Lilly.

handsome kiliKili is a the son of Dis, and nephew of Thorin Oakenshield, son of Thrain, son of Thror and he is supposedly the third in line crown prince of Durin. He grew up seeing Thorin as his father, uncle, and his king. He’s got a close relationship with his oldest brother, Fili. Kili is played by Aidan Turner.

In the movie, he encountered Tauriel in the forest, when she saved his life. After that, he started flirting with her. The short relationship between Tauriel and Kili is just a romantic subplot or others are calling it as an emotional fodder for the audience. Aside from that, if you read the book, you will find out that it won’t make you feel so emotional. I love the book, especially The Silmarillion. It’s great. So their subplot is used to make the story more relatable to the audience. Well, whatever the other reasons for their subplot, I only care about the quality and the validity of their relationship to me.

At first, you would think that it wasn’t love because they’ve only known each other for a very short time. Some even made a joke by using some screencaps in the scene where Tauriel healed Kili’s wound. Every time I remember this it just makes me laugh. The picture is blurry, but you can read it here.

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If you read the book, there’s actually no way to tell that Tauriel and Kili only spent one time talking together in the Mirkwood’s cells, because in the books the dwarves were locked up for months. So if Tauriel established a friendship and a connection with Kili in one scene, she could have visited him and talked to him often which is an opening for them to fall for each other.

Before anything else, let’s establish if there was love at first sight and if they fell in love in the movie:

(1) In watching the scene where they met, Tauriel immediately made an impression to Kili. He gave her a look of incredulity and amazement. The second time they’ve met, he flirted with her, and her response was satisfactory to him. The third time they’ve met, he created an impression with her when he tried to fool her with the rune stone then he started talking about his mom. That’s saying a lot especially to Tauriel considering her upbringing. Her race was taught how dwarves only care about jewels and their gold, but here’s a guy talking about his promise to his mom says otherwise. And Kili was probably taught of the hatred of their race because Thranduil didn’t help them years ago, but Tauriel showed Kili otherwise.

So from the start, there was something going on already. They only got to know each other deeper on their third meeting. So, yes, I’m pretty sure it was love at first sight, no matter how fast.

(2) Their situation also showed that they fell in love with each other. They were in the position to fall in love with each other because they were vulnerable. According to Dr. Helen Fisher, people have the tendency to fall in love when they are vulnerable. There was a bounty on the heads of the Durin line, so Kili is practically a dead man walking.

He almost died in the movie a couple of times and Tauriel saved him three times. Tauriel is also vulnerable at that time because she was trying to help the people of Laketown and especially when she got herself entangled with the dwarfs. She was drawn to Kili from the moment they met.

If you want a summary of the second movie and the romantic moments, The Silver Petticoat Digest included Tauriel and Kili’s moment here.

3) Also, Kili fell in love for Tauriel is because she saved his life more than once and she saved him too. It is one of the reasons people fall in love because we all have a damsel in distress part of us that dreams to be saved by a knight in shining armor. In their case, Kili is the damsel in distress until he returned the favor.

4) Last but not the list, Dr. Helen Fisher also confirmed in her research that when someone fall for us, we also have the possibility to fall for them just because they fell for us. Kili took an interest on Tauriel and he showed her his emotions, and he shared his world to her, that’s some of the reasons for Tauriel to fall for him. He appreciated her for she is and he shared his world to her without their races’ prejudice.

5) In the movie, it also supported Dr. Helen Fisher’s research from her book, Why We Love. As adversity intensifies, so does romantic passion. Adversity heightens passion, romance, and romantic zeal. Adversity stimulates romantic ardour. Adversity heightens pursuit, just as barriers intensify romantic passion.

If you want to understand the Science of Love, the how’s and the why’s of love, you can buy it here and Lovesick by Frank Tallis.

What are the adversities between Tauriel and Kili?

  • Since Tauriel is an elf, and Kili is a dwarf, their race actually forbids them to be together. Tauriel didn’t follow her King’s instructions. She killed the orcs and when she found Kili dying, she couldn’t leave him and ended up healing him. Another adversity here is before she had to choose between following Legolas or staying behind to heal Kili.
  • Also, since their connection is forbidden, it also creates feelings of excitement and novelty for creating a friendship or more between the characters. Their characters are both young, so they were probably drawn to each other due to their differences and worldview.
  • The dwarfs were about to be slaughtered in Ravenhill and Tauriel’s desperation to save Kili made her stopped King Thranduil  from leaving. She tried to stop her King, by aiming her arrow to him.
  • When Tauriel is being beaten by an orc, Kili ran to her side to save her.

In the third movie, The Silver Petticoat also wrote the summary and the romantic moments between Tauriel and Kili here.

I consider their romantic subplot as a relationship because:
kili-and-tauriel– no matter how few the screentime of the actors, in the two movies, they were able to establish an effective chemistry between the characters in total five scenes. Three in the second movie, and two in the third movie. The best part is they didn’t even do so much in that screen time. It was very subtle, but it was very effective. I mean come on! They got my attention. If they have chemistry, I believe it’s romantic chemistry because of the commitment they had towards each other. They were drawn to each other whether they like it or not.  And *empowerment chemistry because they somehow made each other grow in seeing and understanding their different perspectives, upbringing, and beliefs.

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Of course, it’s also thanks to the great chemistry offscreen the actors Evangeline and Aidan have. Whatever the kind of chemistry the actors have offscreen, it was very effective onscreen.

  • Based from my observation of the trilogy, interviews, and blog reviews, the characters’ personality have a high *compatibility.

Tauriel is introverted, socially awkward, dominant, independent, competitive, she is her own person, she has a big heart to share to every soul in middle earth and not just her race, she is curious, rebellious, somehow inexperienced about life and the outside world, she loves the idea of freedom, traveling in different places, and experiencing the world. Her King raised her and trained her to be the best, and Kili gave her more reason to be more than just a Captain of the Guards in one realm.

According to actress, Evangeline Lilly, “…And then as Kili enters her world, he opens up her heart and mind and her soul to the notion of innocence again. She sees innocence and purity in him, and she sees a spark of life that she hasn’t known since before her parents were killed, and it reminds her of the young elf that she maybe threw aside in her pain”. Through this, it shows how strong her lovemap came into play. Kili symbolized a part of herself she lost when her parents died.

Kili is extroverted, adorable, charming, likable, audacious, cheeky, flirtatious, persistent, brave, reckless, young at heart, pure, innocent, experienced in the outside world, vocal and showy when it comes to his affections. They are two kindred souls who found each other by chance, no matter how different, some of their similarities pulled them together. Kili is called reckless by many, but ever since meeting Tauriel, she made him feel he can do anything.

  • Basing it from the *Principle of Completion, Tauriel and Kili made each other feel the key feeling they are looking for. Kili told Tauriel that she made him feel alive and he captured her attention when he shared his adventures with her. Tauriel is not very vocal, but you have to consider that she grew up in a place where people hardly show affection towards her and who controls the way she acts. Kili, on the other hand, adored and appreciated the person she is, let her act freely or he let her be herself and the best part about him is he shared his world and his adventure to her.
  • They became friends and so much more because of the *Intimacy that had formed in the second movie. Kili shared the rune stone that symbolizes his promise to his mom that he will return to her. When Tauriel shared the elves love of the Starlight, Kili shared his experience about the Firemoon that somehow impressed Tauriel.

Take note when something bad happens, Thranduil locked up all his subjects in Mirkwood to protect them, they don’t help out. The only place Tauriel had been is in the forest, but she’d never been to other places.

It may be just a subplot to the movie, but the producers and scriptwriters worked hard to establish Tauriel and Kili’s story because they even made a theme for them.

Tauriel’s and Kili’s script from the second movie was used as the lyrics of the theme.

tauriel script

kili script

The lyrics are in two languages as you can see below, in Elvish and Khuzdul.

feast of starlight lyrics

Below is the whole lyrics characters’ script in the 2nd movie. The first verse refers to Tauriel’s script and the second verse refers to Kili’s script. I agree that Howard Shore captured their romantic subplot perfectly through the theme and also with what the Silver Petticoat said in the blog. That Peter Jackson and his team of writers introduced a beautifully romantic story about two characters that unite as if through a poetic dream.

Feast of Starlight

The theme’s lyrics was written by Philippa Boyens and Howard Shore. The lyrics were translated by David Salo. This theme is based on concept of duality of two voices conversing, as represented by the flute and the oboe. The relationship theme here is between two cultures that traditionally don’t go together.

This is how the theme was made and how it helped tell Tauriel and Kili’s theme. Watch below:

Sad, but it was truly doomed from the start because in The Hobbits book, all the royal line of Durin will die because Dain is the one who will become The King Under The Mountain. It’s still beautiful in my eyes, no matter what.

  • Tauriel and Kili somehow had established a friendship and some familiarity in the movies because of what they shared in their conversation during the dwarves captivity in Mirkwood. Their friendship allowed them to see past each other’s differences and they were able to care for each other.
  • As for the *lovemap, it’s not just chemistry and compatibility that makes the characters match each other’s *lovemap, it’s also because of their upbringing. Different, but similar at the same time. Tauriel and Kili are both looking for something and somehow they were able to give each other that feeling.
  • I debated whether to share this or not, but Kili and Tauriel’s pairing as of now is one of the most ideal couple for me because the writers matched their chemistry, personality, and situation so well to the point that they seem to be twin flames as well. Twin flames is different from a soul mate. According to the literature is that twin flames are the people in our lives who we are going to meet from time to time and help us grow up. The problem is we’re going to be so attach to them to the point of wanting them desperately to become a part of our lives, but they will never belong to us or with us. My predicament here is that your twin soul can never be your soul mate at the same time, but Tauriel and Kili seemed to be soul mates. We expect them to be soul mates because Tauriel fell in love with Kili and elves fall in love only once or chooses only mate in their lifetime. If their mate dies, they fade. Tolkien had written how dwarfs, humans, and elves love and how they grieve.

In reality, will this kind of relationship work considering their differences in race and height?

Yes, I believe so, as long as they don’t let their differences get between them through communication and quality time together. The characters have great chemistry and some things in common, a compatible personality, they are somehow friends and intimate, and their upbringing makes them kindred souls. I can actually imagine Tauriel taming or could handle Kili’s recklessness and just like Evangeline said in her interview, Kili can crack Tauriel’s personality in return.

As for their height difference, I actually know a couple who had more height complications than the characters did. Tauriel and Kili’s complicated height difference is nothing compared to this actress and her lover for years. The actress only stands 3 ft while her previous lover is 6 ft tall or more. I don’t know how they get intimate physically. They probably just do what their height allows them to do OR NOTHING… 😉 I’m not really sure what Tauriel and Kili’s height, but if I compare their pictures together to the actress and her lover, Tauriel and Kili can manage more and with lesser height problems.

Below is  The Feast of Starlight by Howard Shore, Tauriel and Kili’s relationship theme. Enjoy!

At the end of the movie, Lord of the Rings, I remembered Frodo giving Sam the book he and Bilbo wrote their adventures. So I am wishing that Peter Jackson will find a way to use that opportunity to make a movie again. Simply because I love watching the adventures in Middle Earth and I really hope to see Tauriel and Kili reunited. Maybe there’s another way to do that. Who knows, right?

*Thus marked words are defined on this LINK.

Tune in for my next relationship analysis. I love this couple, but it’s tragic. Next week, I promise to write about a movie with a happy ending.

Or basing it on the fact that Tauriel and Kili are twin flames or twin souls, that’s why they didn’t end up together.

What is Chemistry?

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Chemistry, some have it instantaneously with someone and some doesn’t.

All these years, I can recall all the guys I liked or had fallen for. There were six of them, the four were schoolmates, but among them the last two stood out. They were the ones whom I felt a strong chemistry with. Surprisingly, the last person was the most unlikely I’ll ever like or love. Why? He’s basically the complete opposite of my preferences.

So why did I feel that way towards him?

In fact, out of the last two, my feelings for him were more intense and stronger especially after he talked to me. My feelings for him were the hardest to remove because of the chemistry. There are eight types of chemistry and I’m pretty sure I felt the four.

  1. Intellectual Chemistry

The first time I saw him, the idea of him, his work and his writing invigorated me. I just wanted to get to know him! We talked and I thought, it was nice of him to take people like me seriously.

  1. Emotional Chemistry

I got to know him a little better and his story became an inspiration to me and his passion in reaching his dreams, somehow served as a catalyst. He gave my life a 180-degree turn for the better.

  1. Sexual Chemistry

The guys I like are usually clean-shaven, with a tall, lanky frame and they don’t have tattoos, but he’s not clean-shaven, has a huge, hunk-like built or maybe I’m just too small for him, and he’s got tons of tattoos. My preferences disappeared, and I stopped believing that people have types. It also led me to start researching why people fall for a certain person or feel chemistry and how it happens.

  1. Empowerment Chemistry

When I encountered him online, I never thought I would fall for him and I never thought I’ll get to this: How I am now as a person. This is the last, but it’s the most important of all. Because of Dave’s life story, I felt empowered to pursue my dreams, to be comfortable with my own skin, to never give up, to make my dreams happen, and his existence in my life, made me mature more as a human being. Dave was a hell of a ride, but it’s all worth it because of the things I gained as a person.

For more chemistry types, check this LINK.

First, let’s define it.

Chemistry for me is chemicals in our body that results in feelings of desire, excitement, and danger towards the person. You’ll always remember it, the sudden rush of joy the first time you met or saw him, to some, it’s the first touch and the first kiss. You can’t just get enough of it. According to Elizabeth Baldwin, it is the “igniter and catalyst of a relationship“. Luckily, chemistry happens unconsciously, and spontaneously, anyone can create it.

So how do you create chemistry with anyone you like?

  1. Be down-to-earth and sincere

According to Kelly Campbell, Ph.D., “if a person is comfortable with themselves, they are better able to express their true self to the world which makes it better to get to know them, even if perspectives differed”.

  1. Use the 4Ws and H (What, When, Where, Why and How)

Determine the person’s interests or things you have in common and talk about it. Remember: Don’t ask questions that are answerable by Yes or No. Don’t talk too much. It should be two-sided. Don’t share too much information right away. Keep it exciting by preserving the element of mystery.

  1. Mirror-Image

One of the easiest ways to tell if someone like you is through body language when a man is attracted to you, his body is facing towards you. Mirror-Image creates sexual magnetism. In creating a mirror-image, do it as subtle as you could to the point of being accidental. Notice couples on outdoors some are positioned in a mirror-image. According to Nicholas Boothman, Speaker and Author of How to Make Someone Like You in 90 seconds or less and How to Make Someone Fall In Love With you in 90 minutes or less, synchronizing body movements creates Chemistry.

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  1. Find similar experience

Similar experience lets you connect in a deeper level and get to know and understand each other better. When you disclose personal information, remember to sparingly share very serious or personal stuff right away. Balance the information you give.

Chemistry is not just for couples and you can have it with friends, family, and colleagues.

Unfortunately, According to Helen Fisher, Anthropologist and author of Why We Love and Why Him, Why Her, chemicals responsible for love (dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin) is replaced by different chemicals (Oxytocin, bonding hormone, and vasopressin) responsible for feelings of attachment after two years.

At this stage, it puts the couple in a calm state. The urge to mate and reproduce is replaced by feelings of togetherness and attachment to raise their offspring. So if you want to keep the chemistry going, go back to step number one.

It takes practice to make it second nature, so do it with people around you. It improves skills in creating rapport with anyone and it can lead to relationships: Friendship, Romantic Relationship, or Camaraderie with friends or colleagues.

Below is the science of falling in love, check it out.

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Relationship Analysis: Love’s Kitchen

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Love’s Kitchen is about Rob Haley (Dougray Scott), an up-and-coming chef and restaurateur in London, is grief-stricken when he loses his wife. With encouragement from his infamous friend and real life TV Chef Gordon Ramsay, Rob decides to spice up his life by turning a run-down country pub into a gourmet restaurant. His food catches the eye – and taste buds – of beautiful American food critic, Kate Templeton (Claire Forlani) and they soon both write a recipe for love that leaves both their hearts – and their stomachs – full.

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How did the characters meet?

Rob met Kate when he went to The Boot to inquire the owner if the place is still free.Kate is a food critic and a regular visitor of the place and she told the owner he shouldn’t sell it.

Apparently, Rob has a strong dislike to food critics due to his previous experience before. So he immediately acted like a wounded jerk to her the moment they met.

How the characters in the movie are attracted to each other?

When Rob officially opened The Boot, an incident led Kate and Rob to start a deal that led to a friendship and something more.

The attraction wasn’t apparent when they first met, the second time they encountered each other, that’s when they became friends and slowly got to know each other.

Is it *love at first sight or just *lust at first sight?

In the movie, it is not love at first sight or even lust because Rob is still hung up on his dead wife while Kate didn’t really showed interest in him.

The way they see each other only changed when they started the deal and when Kate tasted the meals he made the second time around and his special trifle.

Was there chemistry between the couple?

What’s great about this couple for me is that their chemistry is a good balance between *intellectual, *sexual and *romantic chemistry.

Intellectual because they connected through food.

Romantic and sexual chemistry started to develop as Kate spends more time with him and his daughter, Michelle.

If you read my relationship analysis posts all the time, you’ll notice that I didn’t go very specific with them.

Why?

When people are faking and forcing chemistry on screen, you can get very specific on how the couple tried to act like they have chemistry.

But the chemistry here is so real and natural, it’s sexy subtle. Throw in a little trivia here, I’m probably wrong, but the main actors playing Rob (Dougray Scott) and Kate (Claire Forlani) is married in real life. I don’t know the whole story so if you’re curious, you can tell me about it.

What is the man’s *lovemap? Is it healthy or not?

The man’s lovemap became unhealthy after his wife died. He refuses to take risks in life. Aside from his wife’s accident, he’s deeply traumatized by the critic, he got that at first he refuses to take a risk on The Boot and getting publicity for The Boot.

It was Kate who had changed things around him. She somehow influenced him to take risks and to resolve his issue with food critics.

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My favorite dialog from him to Kate are:

You’ve got to take risks once in a while.

You reminded me of who I was and who I’m supposed to be and what I could be.

Everything has changed because of you.

What is the woman’s *lovemap? Is it healthy or not?

Kate has a healthy lovemap because she is sensible, straightforward, mature, independent, responsible, dominant, proper, does the right thing and has a great sense of humor. Well, you might notice that I’m praising Kate so much, but she’s not perfect. She wasn’t brave enough to confess to Rob that she gave him a bad review years ago.

The movie didn’t focus much on Kate, but if you watch her character. She is so well put together. Yes, she is also sarcastic at some point, which sometimes I find charming and annoying in some parts of the movie.

The great thing about her is she influenced Rob in a big way and even her father. I love her conversation with her Dad when she told him that not everything is about him and how he had hurt her when he fooled around for a while.

Does the relationship contribute to the growth of each person in the relationship?

I’d say, Kate’s personality contributes a lot to Rob’s personality. In fact, in the movie, she may responsible for his failure, but it’s also her who did him a lot of favor.

Do the personalities balance each other, complete each other, or makes them a good team?

Yes. Rob is an introvert while Kate is the opposite. Kate is mature, responsible and a risk taker, but Rob sometimes needs a push to do things.

As for Kate, Rob can tone her impulsiveness and her quick judgment at times.

Are they capable of maintaining a long-lasting relationship?

As long as Rob will stop acting like a bloody fool, a wounded failure, and a jerk. And as long as Kate will have a patience for him and continue giving him stability by being the traits I mentioned above then they will be fine.

Why the relationship will work and last longer? Why not?

The relationship will last because they are both open and straight to each other when it comes to their thoughts,  opinions, and actions.

Well, if Rob acts like an immature, wounded failure and by bringing up the past, and if Kate loses her patience over him, then the relationship won’t even work.

If you’re looking for a movie with foods that will feed your eyes and your taste, unfortunately, that’s not the focus of the movie, it’s the romance, personal growth, and healing. The movie has some bad reviews, but I don’t really care about them because what I care about is the quality of the relationships in movies. It’s a feel good movie with its own charm, funny moments and characters with some growing up lessons and second chances in love.

What’s the point of having a cool plot, explosions, and expensive movie budgets, if the developed characters and relationships are crappy and actors are wrong for the characters? Right?

*Thusly marked words are defined on this LINK.